1.Addressing sickness is not a top propriety for most. Erik convinced himself he was ok and ignored the physical state of his body to continue with his art show.
2.Erik was hesitant and defensive when his sickness was called out.
3.Ignoring how Erik felt he continued to accomplish his work on producing his art show. Like Erik most people tend to convince themselves they are fine, they do not want to deal with the burden of getting sick. Only when it becomes unbearable do they seek medical attention.
4.Erik and his family delayed getting medical attention before they had insurance. there are certain preparations that are made before going to see a doctor.
5.There was never any discussion related to death or the process of dying in Erik's experience.
6.Beth avoiding her husband being known as his disease, or just another number. It was important to her that people see him as the artistic people he was.
7.Once there were no other alternatives, Erik’s final stages were made as comfortable as possible for him.
8.Illness is the reality that humans are not immortal, and this gave Beth anew found appreciation for the everyday simple things.
9.When Erik died, everything was taken over by stillness.
To Beth, it never seemed possible that Erik, her upbeat husband could be defected by a termination illness. Being faced so close to death Beth was hit with the reality of immortality. For many of us it feels like such an unknown, unlikely, distance thing. Being someone who has no close personal experiences death seems unworldly. It is well known that death is inevitable. All of our days are numbered. Facing the challenges of dealing with an illness Beth developed with a newfound appreciation for the everyday simple things.
Addressing illness is not a top propriety. Erik ignored the state of his body and was determined to pursue his career goal. On several occasions he was asked if he was ok. Erik was defensive; he avoided the feeling of being weak. He was able to convince himself and others he was fine. Even though the symptoms where there; Erik would no longer sleep lying down, he coughed, and had noticeable weight loss. Moving down the list of priorities, Erik finally seeked medical attention. Like Erik most people tend to convince themselves they are fine, they do not want to deal with the burden of getting sick. Only when it becomes unbearable do they seek medical attention.
I respect Beth’s strength and courage coming to tell her story. It must’ve been easy for her to talk so openly about something so personal to a bunch of strangers. During the discussion I couldn’t help but feel bad. I couldn’t help but have the urge to apologize, like most of us do when we hear about a death; “Sorry for your loss” “Sorry that happen”. But it doesn’t change anything; it doesn’t make anything better, why do we say it? The way most of us handle someone’s loss is by throwing them pity. by doing so, we should a side of sensitivity, without being able to ever understand how they feel. I can’t imagine every losing someone that close to me. It is well aware that death is inevitable, no one gets out alive, is there a way we can better prepare for it? Beth mentioned dying before everyone you cared about. It occurred to me that sometimes it’s the people who are alive who get most effected by death.
I like how you elaborate on your emotions during the telling of her story. I wasn’t able to observe Beth or be apart of the discussion and react to it. But from reading yours I can see how I might have.
ReplyDeleteDeath is definitely seen in society as an unfortunate event, especially for those who’ve experienced it first hand. But my question is can their be a sense of beauty in death? Particularly those who’ve experienced it.
The topic i am choosing to comment on is the beauty of your writing. When reading it i feel like what your saying truly flows out of you. The emotion as Tamiko said is a very strong part of your writing and i feel that any one who reads this will know that. i specifically liked the line "Being faced so close to death Beth was hit with the reality of immortality. For many of us it feels like such an unknown, unlikely, distance thing." because i felt like i could connect to this, i too feel as if death is so far away and unknown even though unlike you i have had a close experience involving the death of someone.
ReplyDeleteThe beauty of your writing was so genuine. I believe that everything you wrote was straight from your heart. This piece made me realize things that i never noticed and there was a lot of depth depth put into this piece. The quote, "Like Erik most people tend to convince themselves they are fine, they do not want to deal with the burden of getting sick. Only when it becomes unbearable do they seek medical attention." Reminded me that nobody wants to admit that they are ill. This quote Also reminded me that most people like Erik would never go seek medical help, and it is only when they are greatly ill that they will go seek medical help. However even in that condition the ill would still rather not go to the hospital because most people believe that the hospital is the "last destination" in there life and dying is something almost nobody wants to go through.
ReplyDeleteI think the way you added your feeling into your writing, is what really made it powerful. Your writing is beautiful and makes me connect to my own life. I loved how you said "it’s the people who are alive who get most effected by death." I liked this quote because its true. When people die, it greatly affects the people who are living. I think by using a story to convey your ideas it makes the reader more interested in the meaning of it. Another quote i like is " Being someone who has no close personal experiences death seems unworldly" because this quote is so honest. And even though you dont have any personal experience to death, you seem like you can really relate to those people who have experienced death, which is very impressive.
ReplyDeleteThinking about dying or losing a loved one is uncomfortable and so ignoring signs that expose one's sense of mortality often becomes a preferred course. Once death or fatal illness becomes evident the mourning process begins. Everyone mourns differently: some cry, some give thanks for the person's impact on their lives, and some throw a wild party like in New Orleans. Since death is a part of life, maybe more time should be spent developing a philosophy about life, so that when it ends, we can put it into better context and be less surprised, and thus, less effected. Maybe, just maybe, life is "Hell", and "Heaven" is the place you go to when you die. Maybe, just maybe, when you die, you go "home". Maybe the tough part is the lessons each person learns as they travel through the winding paths that are life. If true, shouldn't we be celebrating their return "home"? Maybe, just maybe, we feel sad only because we selfishly know that we have to complete our journey without the presence of the one who died. If we were truly thinking about them, then maybe we should celebrating the time we had together; celebrating their return home; and be happy to know they will be waiting for us when its our turn.
ReplyDelete