With no prior knowledge of the stances of the people I interviewed I approached the conversation very causally. I have found that a more conversation-based word exchange is better than just shooting out questions. When talking about controversial issues I try to avoid “attacking” or offending the person at all costs. Therefore I started saying what their beliefs were on birth. Simply that so there was no wrong answer and I would have more of a foundation of their thoughts to work with. I respect the request to kept names unsaid, and so I apologize for using mostly he/she’s.
Marriage=babies?
I was pleased to find that one of the first people I started talking to about birth was comfortable talking to me (practically a stranger) about it. I felt that the frame of her plan was very similar to the dominant one of our society. Initially we discussed the factor of age. What age is too early to be thinking about having children? Personally she thought it all depended on age, “It is a matter of maturity, 17 or 27.” We continued our talk, making it more personally. She talked about how she “wasn’t ready to have a child now” nor did she want one right now, but when she finds the right person that’s when she would consider children. I think its strange how people go on a search for the right one and only then do they consider children. It seems like an important step in our society of the American dream. This was a common thought with the second person I interviewed. He thought it was better to have children when two people were married, “its better for the child physiologically to have parents that are closer together.” Theoretically he thinks that a marriage makes parents look “established” and stronger. This justifies why marriage is better for the child. While the parents are in a bond hard to get out of it forces the family together. But above all “Parenting together would just makes everything easier.”
Celebration
If you did not already hear the term baby shower what would you have thought? Person number 3 described an experience going to a baby shower, “It was all her girl friend celebrating her baby.” A baby shower is simply a way to welcome the baby and congratulate the mom to be. Who came up with that? We discussed the topic further, although she didn’t seem very interested. She did not see what I personally found so strange with the process of a baby shower. Although I have no first hand experience, I’m not one to judge. She discussed with me what she knew. That baby showers are usually only held for the first child. But gave no reasoning, if its purpose is to congratulate the mom to be then a baby shower for your first born signifies your role forever as a mother?
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