Comments

To Matt

I agree with sharif that your post is very interesting. In particular the people you chose to interview. the both interviews work almost as intersecting ones. The women being the one "incurably" sad and changed by her first hand experience. Sometimes an experience can mold our personal beliefs. The interview with the man took a different approach, one that was founded on his professional work space and an outside view. His idea that "heaven is looking at a new born baby, while hell is loosing someone you love." is interesting and new to me. It is a thought that characters heaven and hell as more of an emotion than a actually place. I appriate the approach you took while writing this piece.

:)

p.s. I realize i did not comment on a small aspect of your writing, however I choice to focus in on the bigger idea of the whole piece. I hope my comment is helpful in some way.

To Sharif

I enjoyed this piece. Your mothers and your fathers interviews were filled with very different view points. Your comparison and contrasts were well done. I appreciated that you generated and shared some worth while questions. The point you made about our cultures and others particularly caught my eye. Your question regarding this point: "How much does our culture/ generational norms effect our decisions?" is interesting. Personally I think it plays a big part in our decisions about death. Thinking about a person who is raised in a culture where they value the practice of their religion might be more incline to follow through with those practices.

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From Janet

Your blog on death made me stop and reflect on what I would like after my time on this earth is finished. I had of course thought about it, but really just briefly and more in the aspects of how my children would be taken care of and provided for if I were to die when they were young. I appreciate the comments by Hadley the most and could relate to the positiveness she exuded. I especially liked the idea of having her ashes spread in different parts of the world that meant something to her. I find her plans romantic even and take solace in the prospect of my death being handled in a very similar way. The comment where the main point seemed to be "what do I care about my death after it has already happened" actually made me feel sad. The reference to the finality of death was almost depressing. After reading it, I began to reflect that maybe this type of attitude is what people who embraced religion and its beliefs in the after life sought to avoid. There is a great deal of comfort in believing that you will somehow endure after death. It was a thought provoking essay Arden, one in which I feel I benefited from and appreciated.

From Matt

Your Post made me think of A Grateful Dead quote "What a long strange trip it's been."
You did areal nice job in this post. You really illuminated each interview . I think you and all of the people you interviewed really had some interesting points. To me personally your interviews with Robert and Hadley stood out. I could really relate to Robert when he said "is dead, it doesn't really matter to me." ,In a lot of ways I really agree with this statement because when I die, I die ,alot after that doesn't matter life goes on. While you were critical of Hadley's optimism, I actually appreciate it. Especially when she was describing the service she wants when she dies and says she wants a service "where they could come and remember me the good and the bad. You know just remember me for me." That's exactly how I would want my service to be. I don't want after my death somehow to become a saint or a devil I just want be "remembered for me" . I know as naive as it sounds but I want people to have a party at my funeral, I want music and I want all the people I use to know from way before. I think that's what Hadley was getting at also that people when it comes to death and funerals tend to be sad. Who wants that ? I know I didn't live my entire life to have people at the very end sad and make more out of me then needed. And yes spreading ashes in certain places is illegal but those are one of those times where I think its all right to break the rules. I know my mom and aunt spread my grandmothers ashes in a garden that she loved in central park now that was differently illegal but its what she wanted. Whose to say every one's final resting place has to be six feet under. You had a great post keep it up cant wait to read more .

From Sharif

Arden, Your blog post as usual was very thoughtful. i felt your analysis was very strong and contained no "bubbles" but instead all somewhat deep thoughts. my favorite part was when you said "It is a helpful way for loved ones to gain emotional support. A Memorial or a funeral is a public display of acknowledgment of the persons life. Some are held with traditions and some not as much. I was intrigued by the religious tradition addressed in this interview. Due to my lack of knowledge about it in the fist place. From this conversation I began to search for excerpts from the Torah. Ideas of the after life seem to be vaguely discussed." I thought that you went above and beyond what most students would have done and actually did your own research into the subject of your specific religious afterlife beliefs.

From Hadley

The different interviews that you had with other people was a smart thing to do. I say this because it was interesting to read about the different opinions people have and their different plans. One interview that really stood out to me was with your sister Hadley. She seems so intellegent and bright. If i were you, I wouldnt be so quick to judge, Hadley's plan does seem opitmistic, but maybe she thinks of death as something more. You are lucky to have a sister like that! On a more serious note, i love the the line where you said "...that if a person believes there is only one life, one body, then why not cherish that one you have?" My thinking here is that if a person believes life ends compleltly after death then where is the motivation to do anything. right? we all end up the save way anyway.